Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
this is the song that never ends....
We started with a tummy bug, then colds that were actually fever that actually was Influenza B. And after seven people cycled through both of those- tummy bug eight- we started over with the stomach flu again! WOOHOO!
This is the flu that never ends,
it just goes on and on my friends...
Somebody started getting it, not knowing who it's from,
and then we kept on getting it forever
just because this is the flu that never ends...
I want to have the baby. I mean, I go back and forth. I want to wait until my family is not coughing or sniffling or vomitting or chilling or running to the toilet for other unmentionable reasons. But part of me is sure that I'm ready now and that it could- it should- happen at any given second.
I'm crabby. I want to be done with all of this. I want to have a normal day-to-day routine that works and sticks. I've never had that, but I want it. Even when we aren't sick I don't have that, really. But I think about having it and it'd be nice.
Deisha started potty training- oh--- maybe a month ago or more. She would go days and days without an accident, until she had to poop and then she'd hide and let it go. Now she's wetting her pants four, five, six times a day. I want her to be potty trained. I made this mistake with Kennedy and said I'd never do it again, but I am. I'm forcing it. She CAN stay dry, she just doesn't want to.
I gotta go. There's no rest. There's no escape. I'm starting to lose it a little.
lvb
This is the flu that never ends,
it just goes on and on my friends...
Somebody started getting it, not knowing who it's from,
and then we kept on getting it forever
just because this is the flu that never ends...
I want to have the baby. I mean, I go back and forth. I want to wait until my family is not coughing or sniffling or vomitting or chilling or running to the toilet for other unmentionable reasons. But part of me is sure that I'm ready now and that it could- it should- happen at any given second.
I'm crabby. I want to be done with all of this. I want to have a normal day-to-day routine that works and sticks. I've never had that, but I want it. Even when we aren't sick I don't have that, really. But I think about having it and it'd be nice.
Deisha started potty training- oh--- maybe a month ago or more. She would go days and days without an accident, until she had to poop and then she'd hide and let it go. Now she's wetting her pants four, five, six times a day. I want her to be potty trained. I made this mistake with Kennedy and said I'd never do it again, but I am. I'm forcing it. She CAN stay dry, she just doesn't want to.
I gotta go. There's no rest. There's no escape. I'm starting to lose it a little.
lvb
Saturday, January 08, 2011
The List
I'm making SUCH great progress on my list that I decided to stop and give you a little update. Don't get excited, no px yet. My room is occupied by a very sick dude right now so I can't get to my camera at present. Soon I will, soon!
It's getting so close. I'm having a baby soon. A new life is coming into my world. For so many of my pregnancies I have known what to expect. I know that for a year, or so, I won't sleep more than a few hours at a time. I will cry every day for most of that year; not sad tears, just random tears of varying emotions. I will wear maternity clothes for part of it because I will not lose most of the baby weight until close to the end of that year. In the meantime I will change hundreds and hundreds of diapers. I will endure the all-encompassing chore of breastfeeding. (Those first weeks are bad.... verrrrry bad for me.) No one else will be able to comfort the baby like I will, which means my life will not be my own for a long, long time. This has been the focus of the last few.
This time I feel differently. I have these amazing little lives coming into adulthood, slowly but surely, that are blossoming into individuals right before my eyes. The potential for each of them is awe-inspiring. I love it! I love that God keeps blessing us with new life. (Listen, I know I wrote something very different just days ago. This is what is real today.) God is good, soooo soooo good. I feel at peace about what is to come; I no longer feel overwhelmed by all the changes coming. I am ready to bring my baby home to partake in the goodness of the blessings of the Lord in our lives, and all the chaos and insanity that we add to that pot!
lvb
It's getting so close. I'm having a baby soon. A new life is coming into my world. For so many of my pregnancies I have known what to expect. I know that for a year, or so, I won't sleep more than a few hours at a time. I will cry every day for most of that year; not sad tears, just random tears of varying emotions. I will wear maternity clothes for part of it because I will not lose most of the baby weight until close to the end of that year. In the meantime I will change hundreds and hundreds of diapers. I will endure the all-encompassing chore of breastfeeding. (Those first weeks are bad.... verrrrry bad for me.) No one else will be able to comfort the baby like I will, which means my life will not be my own for a long, long time. This has been the focus of the last few.
This time I feel differently. I have these amazing little lives coming into adulthood, slowly but surely, that are blossoming into individuals right before my eyes. The potential for each of them is awe-inspiring. I love it! I love that God keeps blessing us with new life. (Listen, I know I wrote something very different just days ago. This is what is real today.) God is good, soooo soooo good. I feel at peace about what is to come; I no longer feel overwhelmed by all the changes coming. I am ready to bring my baby home to partake in the goodness of the blessings of the Lord in our lives, and all the chaos and insanity that we add to that pot!
lvb
Tuesday, January 04, 2011
Sickies
Writing more talking less...? Hardly.
It's a lofty goal for month nine.
There is so much I want to do, and there are a million distractions that keep me from being functional.
I have a houseful of sick kids today. It's been a gradual progression of fallout. One went down, then another, then two more... now all six feeling yucky, moaning, drinking Sprite, eating crackers. The fevers are almost gone with the exception of the latecomers. I'm ok, I don't mind taking a sick day from school in exchange for a marathon of movies. The big kids are still considerate of overworking me and the little ones don't have the energy to ask for much. It could be so much worse. And I feel good- that helps. Only, I'm a little concerned about being this close to my due date with so much infection floating around the house. I may lock the kids in the basement for a few hours so I can air the house and disinfect everything.
As far as being prepared for another baby, I could hardly be prepared. I was lying in bed monitoring the coughing through the night and thinking about why I feel so unprepared. Honestly, the only thing you need for a new baby is a safe place for it to sleep and warm clothes. Breastfeeding, check. Diapers- they give you some at the hospital. I've got clean sheets for the cosleeper and a carseat... I am emotionally unprepared. Each baby has come as a surprise, a gift. The ones closer to the end of the line have also come with the shock factor. With that I sort of deny the reality for the first few months, endure the pregnancy for the next few, and then convince myself that it's really happening at the end, thus coming to full preparedness. With Deisha I woke up surprised to find a baby crying next to me for more than a few weeks every night. This time I am sure it will be much the same. I feel a little crazy for feeling this way and for saying it out loud. I'm sure you think it should be old hat by this time, but it's just not. It's new every time. I'll have more help this time and more emotional support closeby.
Here's my conclusion. I love my life. I don't like disruptions. I struggle with change. After moving for the 49th time and adding children every few years for the past 15 years, you'd think I'd accept it, but it's just not the way I am. I will be elated to hold my new baby and bring it home to join my family. It's the unknown that holds me back from fully embracing my circumstances. I don't know how much my life will change, how much I'll have to take from one to give to another, how long I'll be hormonally hijacked from being my normal self.
So that's where I'm at. I really want to post some pictures, and I will. After the list is done. And the list is long. But I will soon. I even had Kennedy snap one belly shot for those of you that have asked. Prepare yourself. It's a little shocking.
lvb
It's a lofty goal for month nine.
There is so much I want to do, and there are a million distractions that keep me from being functional.
I have a houseful of sick kids today. It's been a gradual progression of fallout. One went down, then another, then two more... now all six feeling yucky, moaning, drinking Sprite, eating crackers. The fevers are almost gone with the exception of the latecomers. I'm ok, I don't mind taking a sick day from school in exchange for a marathon of movies. The big kids are still considerate of overworking me and the little ones don't have the energy to ask for much. It could be so much worse. And I feel good- that helps. Only, I'm a little concerned about being this close to my due date with so much infection floating around the house. I may lock the kids in the basement for a few hours so I can air the house and disinfect everything.
As far as being prepared for another baby, I could hardly be prepared. I was lying in bed monitoring the coughing through the night and thinking about why I feel so unprepared. Honestly, the only thing you need for a new baby is a safe place for it to sleep and warm clothes. Breastfeeding, check. Diapers- they give you some at the hospital. I've got clean sheets for the cosleeper and a carseat... I am emotionally unprepared. Each baby has come as a surprise, a gift. The ones closer to the end of the line have also come with the shock factor. With that I sort of deny the reality for the first few months, endure the pregnancy for the next few, and then convince myself that it's really happening at the end, thus coming to full preparedness. With Deisha I woke up surprised to find a baby crying next to me for more than a few weeks every night. This time I am sure it will be much the same. I feel a little crazy for feeling this way and for saying it out loud. I'm sure you think it should be old hat by this time, but it's just not. It's new every time. I'll have more help this time and more emotional support closeby.
Here's my conclusion. I love my life. I don't like disruptions. I struggle with change. After moving for the 49th time and adding children every few years for the past 15 years, you'd think I'd accept it, but it's just not the way I am. I will be elated to hold my new baby and bring it home to join my family. It's the unknown that holds me back from fully embracing my circumstances. I don't know how much my life will change, how much I'll have to take from one to give to another, how long I'll be hormonally hijacked from being my normal self.
So that's where I'm at. I really want to post some pictures, and I will. After the list is done. And the list is long. But I will soon. I even had Kennedy snap one belly shot for those of you that have asked. Prepare yourself. It's a little shocking.
lvb
Friday, December 24, 2010
Merry Christmas EVE!!!
I'm not sure what happened this year. Last year we kicked off our celebrations as usual on the first of November and on December 26th when I took all the decorations down, I was ready. This year I am already sad that we're so close to the end. BUT, rather than mourn the loss of something not yet lost, I am choosing to rejoice in each moment until the end comes.
Merry Christmas Eve to one and all! It's SNOWING!!!!! We woke up to a beautiful blanket of white, which is yet another answer to some diligent and persistent prayers of the Sutton children. He loves us so beautifully.
I have a list of things I need to get done today, including fininshing three presents and making some stocking stuffers. Also I'll be doing some more Christmas baking as well as making cinnamon rolls for Christmas morning brunch. The big kids are sledding, the little ones are watching the Christmas movie marathon that is happening right now.
Life is good, my friends. I only wish we could all be together on this blessed day. Since we can't, I'm wishing you the very best for two more days.
lvb
Sunday, December 19, 2010
Contemplation
After a series of unfortunate events in my life, I find myself sort of clinging to what matters.
My sweet Gram passed most unexpectedly which sent me into alarm. Painful as it was, the Lord has used this circumstance to corner me and my restless heart.
Most recently Dale and I became suddenly struck with the worst stomach flu of our existence to date. I came very close to dehydration and nearly threw myself into pre-term labor for want of necessary instruction. Thanks to a simple remedy, some tlc, and the blessing of a dear friend, we avoided a trip to the hospital. After two days of complete bedrest and another day of bursts of energy followed by debilitating exhaustion, I think we're better.
Because of these trials my heart is atune to the goodness of God and His mercy toward me. He has never failed me nor ceased to show me his loving kindness.
I miss writing. I was going through the precious items I was priviledged to receive from my Gram's collection of goodies. Of all the things that were given to me, the most treasured of them all were the handwritten recipe cards. I feel selfish keeping them all to myself, so if you have any want of them, I'll gladly share. It has given me great consideration of the legacy I'm leaving for my children. I would've loved to find a journal of the daily happenings in her life, a peek into her reality. Not taking the time to write not only robs me of a tiny corner of joy in my life, but a may be robbing a snipett of wisdom or insight for my children.
I want to write more and talk less. It's a goal, if nothing else.
lvb
My sweet Gram passed most unexpectedly which sent me into alarm. Painful as it was, the Lord has used this circumstance to corner me and my restless heart.
Most recently Dale and I became suddenly struck with the worst stomach flu of our existence to date. I came very close to dehydration and nearly threw myself into pre-term labor for want of necessary instruction. Thanks to a simple remedy, some tlc, and the blessing of a dear friend, we avoided a trip to the hospital. After two days of complete bedrest and another day of bursts of energy followed by debilitating exhaustion, I think we're better.
Because of these trials my heart is atune to the goodness of God and His mercy toward me. He has never failed me nor ceased to show me his loving kindness.
I miss writing. I was going through the precious items I was priviledged to receive from my Gram's collection of goodies. Of all the things that were given to me, the most treasured of them all were the handwritten recipe cards. I feel selfish keeping them all to myself, so if you have any want of them, I'll gladly share. It has given me great consideration of the legacy I'm leaving for my children. I would've loved to find a journal of the daily happenings in her life, a peek into her reality. Not taking the time to write not only robs me of a tiny corner of joy in my life, but a may be robbing a snipett of wisdom or insight for my children.
I want to write more and talk less. It's a goal, if nothing else.
lvb
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Thankful
God has answered our prayers! After much investigation and a small fortune in odor fighters, we have found the cause of the stink in our house and resolved it completely! Hallelujah! Turns out it was sewer gas and all of you that told me to pour water down the drain were right! We didn't know that there was a second floor drain in our basement that had gone totally neglected all this time, only to blast sewer gasses through the house in greater and greater portions for the past month. Thankfully we didn't have a massive explosion or any psychotic behavior- any more than usual anyway.
Speaking of being thankful, I can never fully express my gratitude for the answer to our prayers to come home. This time last year we were anticipating a moving date and truly had an end in sight to our- adveture- in California. Weeks before as the season of joy approached, we were fighting a constant undercurrent of sadness on account of being so far away.
I don't know why God loves us the way He does. It seems His blessing will never cease, even though my failures seem to veil the true intentions of my heart toward Him over and over again. But I am thankful, completely and totally thankful. God has blessed my life and given me every good and perfect gift in my life.
So Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours and as you count your blessings, name them one by one!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
If I were still using Facebook...
If I were still using Facebook, I would list my productivity on my status as follows:
This morning before nine o'clock I: cleaned our room, walked two miles, cleaned out the pantry, watered the yard, and did all the laundry.
I am glad that I don't get on Facebook anymore because I always thought it was so annoying that people wrote their completed to-do lists as their status. But this morning I thought of them fondly and could relate to their intentions in doing so.
Here's something really cool that happened this morning to boot. Leila opened the cabinet and stood in mouth-open-awe at the lovely display of cans and boxes neatly organized in grocery store fashion. Instant gratification. Someone recognized and appreciated my work.
What I don't want to tell you is that I... didn't make Dale anything to take in his lunch this morning. The only thing he had for to eat for breakfast was the last couple of packages of instant oatmeal. He couldn't find the snacks he usually takes to work because most of them were- gone. Hence the cleaning of the pantry. He asked why we didn't have so many things. I couldn't answer until I opened the door to the pantry and realized that it only looked full because it was full of mostly empty boxes that needed to be cleaned out.
And also I couldn't find the dogs this morning so I assumed they were upstairs with the kids. I went to bed early and from total exhaustion last night and missed a few details. One of those being the dogs. They slept in the basement. And pooped on the floor. Nasty.
But I got a lot of things done today and by golly, I am excited about it!
I am wondering if we have a dead mouse in our air conditioning ducts. Every time the air conditioner kicked on yesterday I was overcome by that awful stench. I know it well because we had mice way back when we lived in the country. So far we have not had mice here, but I know that smell. Any advice I rooting it out? I can't risk the decomposure of a mouse in the ducts when it's time to turn up the heat!
lvb
This morning before nine o'clock I: cleaned our room, walked two miles, cleaned out the pantry, watered the yard, and did all the laundry.
I am glad that I don't get on Facebook anymore because I always thought it was so annoying that people wrote their completed to-do lists as their status. But this morning I thought of them fondly and could relate to their intentions in doing so.
Here's something really cool that happened this morning to boot. Leila opened the cabinet and stood in mouth-open-awe at the lovely display of cans and boxes neatly organized in grocery store fashion. Instant gratification. Someone recognized and appreciated my work.
What I don't want to tell you is that I... didn't make Dale anything to take in his lunch this morning. The only thing he had for to eat for breakfast was the last couple of packages of instant oatmeal. He couldn't find the snacks he usually takes to work because most of them were- gone. Hence the cleaning of the pantry. He asked why we didn't have so many things. I couldn't answer until I opened the door to the pantry and realized that it only looked full because it was full of mostly empty boxes that needed to be cleaned out.
And also I couldn't find the dogs this morning so I assumed they were upstairs with the kids. I went to bed early and from total exhaustion last night and missed a few details. One of those being the dogs. They slept in the basement. And pooped on the floor. Nasty.
But I got a lot of things done today and by golly, I am excited about it!
I am wondering if we have a dead mouse in our air conditioning ducts. Every time the air conditioner kicked on yesterday I was overcome by that awful stench. I know it well because we had mice way back when we lived in the country. So far we have not had mice here, but I know that smell. Any advice I rooting it out? I can't risk the decomposure of a mouse in the ducts when it's time to turn up the heat!
lvb
Monday, October 18, 2010
Leila's 5!!!
At least I get the camera out for birthdays... It's birthday season here!
WOOHOO! YAY YAY YAY LEILA!!!
We have minimized our birthday obsessions for the kiddos this year, so I only had two presents for Leila to open.
One was this knitted bear. I made it a hat and scarf too, but since the day she opened the package it's been MIA. That's the breaks around here.
Dale's mom and dad, Aunt Angie and his cousin Lisa all came to celebrate with us. It was a beautiful night so after we ate we all sat around in lawn chairs in the front yard. That's my favorite.
We also had a huge princess party at my mom's but I can't seem to find any photos from that day. ugh. I feel so scattered lately.
So anywayss, Happy Birthday, Lol!!
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Trebo's 8!!!
So Tre turned 8 a few months ago... in August and here is a teeny memoir of this joyous celebration. This party took place with our church family at our house. See what I meant earlier? I made the cake and he decorated it with M&Ms. Sometimes I'm a total slacker.
Clearly here is another cake from our party with Dana and family. I don't know why I don't have more pictures. Poor Trebo. His memory will have to do the job.
We also had a party with my a bunch of my family that came for the weekend to celebrate Tre and Gavin, my nephew. Somehow I didn't get a single photograph of the party. My brother, T.R. has some px on Facebook if you are curious. My mom made the cutest army cake with rock candy and a battle scene. She also brought camo handkerchiefs (chieves?) for everyone which was super fun! But did I snap a single picture? Nope. It's pregnancy... I lose all my marbles in the process of growing a life. It's legit, I think, but none the less frustrating.
Anyway, Happy Birthday sweet Trebo! You are amazing!!
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